We're watching House. It's a TV show.
House says, "So you aren't fulfilled by taking care of him... you get nothing out of it... but NOT taking care of him would make you feel worse."
She didn't say anything.
Tuesday, September 05, 2006
Sunday, September 03, 2006
Imago Therapy
We went to a marriage therapist yesterday. It was the Weekend From Hell that prompted it, but it took a while for it to sink in with her before she agreed to it.
She uses "Imago Therapy" which takes the theory that we pick partners who are like our parents in order to resolve childhood conflicts... and thereby marry the person who is best able to hurt us.
Our first session involved gathering some basic information about our families, and then we immediately started a "mirroring" exercise. One person was the speaker, the other the mirror. The mirror's job was simply to repeat what the first person said.
We started with "What I think frustrates you about me is..."
After going through as many of these as I could think of, she filled in what I had missed with "What frustrates me about you is..."
Then we switched. It was vulnerable and empowering and scary and great.
We have some homework to do before our next session, some groundwork about what we want out of the therapy and what our childhood caregivers were like.
We go back in two weeks. I am very hopeful.
She uses "Imago Therapy" which takes the theory that we pick partners who are like our parents in order to resolve childhood conflicts... and thereby marry the person who is best able to hurt us.
Our first session involved gathering some basic information about our families, and then we immediately started a "mirroring" exercise. One person was the speaker, the other the mirror. The mirror's job was simply to repeat what the first person said.
We started with "What I think frustrates you about me is..."
After going through as many of these as I could think of, she filled in what I had missed with "What frustrates me about you is..."
Then we switched. It was vulnerable and empowering and scary and great.
We have some homework to do before our next session, some groundwork about what we want out of the therapy and what our childhood caregivers were like.
We go back in two weeks. I am very hopeful.
Sunday, August 06, 2006
I may have found the secret.
I haven't posted in a while.
I've been corresponding with Ann Regentin, an erotica author who writes about disabled people. I was drawn to open the conversation by an article she wrote called "Plan D: Love in the world of Chronic Illness"
I'm still emailing back and forth, and while she has had many practical suggestions, she said that she didn't have the essential piece of the puzzle. Her partners (an ex-husband and an ex-lover) had never come to terms with her disability, and she didn't know how I could do it.
She set me on the path, however, and I think I may have come to it. I'm not sure, so I'm going to let this percolate, let this set a while, and make sure that I know what I'm talking about.
Then I'll post, I promise.
I've been corresponding with Ann Regentin, an erotica author who writes about disabled people. I was drawn to open the conversation by an article she wrote called "Plan D: Love in the world of Chronic Illness"
I'm still emailing back and forth, and while she has had many practical suggestions, she said that she didn't have the essential piece of the puzzle. Her partners (an ex-husband and an ex-lover) had never come to terms with her disability, and she didn't know how I could do it.
She set me on the path, however, and I think I may have come to it. I'm not sure, so I'm going to let this percolate, let this set a while, and make sure that I know what I'm talking about.
Then I'll post, I promise.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
